Grief is something that comes with life. Over the past couple years, I have experienced a lot of it. However, the most recent process of grieving has made me stronger in many aspects.
For me, grief has built resiliency through the extreme emotions that come with it. I say this because I recently lost my best friend (Ava) and another dear friend (Jesse) 6 days later. During this time, I have been challenged to rely on God, use coping skills, and partake in self-care more than ever. Although tears are a major part of grieving, I still managed to do other things that are good for me. I asked God for continued peace, I reached out to my support so I could vent, I went to meetings almost every day, and I consistently went to the gym. I really did not feel like doing these things, but my surroundings gave me positive encouragement to step into them. This gave me a chance to practice healthy coping mechanisms during some of the most challenging times of my life. This did not completely relieve me of emotions, I still step away to shed tears and have overwhelming feelings of sadness but I have learned to embrace them. I still breakdown when I wake up everyday, I still lose it when I see a reminder of them, I still raise questions towards God! However, my continued wellness has allowed me to reflect with a different perspective for the most part. I am able to reminisce on the memories and the good times we shared. Which reminds me of how grateful I am to have had the years that I did with loved ones that will forever have a good impact on my life.
I know they would want me to keep fighting so I will. The fight isn't easy but it has proved a level of strength I never knew I had. That strength is in remembrance of them which will stay with me forever.
I love yall